v's virtual vacuum
September 29, 2003
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Gorgeoushe doesn't feel the need to meet up again just yet *pout* which makes me feel terribly unloved and rejected and like a bit of a fool to be honest.
It's a bit of a long story but I shall try to edit
we've been chatting on and off for two years, but very regularly for about a year and texting since christmas and talking on the phone since not sure when - march? and we've exchanged postal addresses recently, say, July
he'd never met anyone from the internet in real life before it and took me nine months to convince him that he and I should meet up which we did in august and it went really well
the big but is that he's a bit of a loner, is currently back home with his parents and isn't very experienced in relationships - he has only ever spoken to me about one girlfriend (ex)
his self esteem is (was) non existant and he would never ever ever approach a woman in realife for fear of being turned down - but he is the loveliest, most clever, stimulating, engaging person I have spent time with in the recent past and I really have the biggest crush on him and want to spend more real life time with him to see if there is any potential in us having a relationship, but I guess either he doesn't want a relationship with me or he doesn't want a relationship at the moment and I am too scared to work out or find out which is it. and I am so so so so sad. but he's still gorgeous.