v's virtual vacuum
Saturday, Nov. 17, 2007
Back to the cave
After another pretty stupid week at work I completely lost the plot on thursday - I could feel myself slidinginto crisis. not a good situation. I went into the NHS walkin centre across the road from where my second event of the week was and asked to speak to someone. I didnt even know what I was going to say but fortunately a really great nurse sat with me for a bit and sympathised and suggested I see a GP at my practice to discuss my medication and the way forward.after much deliberation I agreed and she organised an appointment for me. I went to see the doc that evening and we chatted for a while and he thinks I need to take time off work, I have to sort out my sleep and get some daytime exercise and basically get my head sorted out. I really didnt want to take time off work - I think I jsut wanted a magic wand, but now that he's written the note I feel a sense of relief.
Now I just have to work out how the hell I explain it to my boss! shes back on monday after a fortnight off, and my colleague is off work on monday to take her mom to the hospital for a scan and I feel really quite bad in many ways about leaving boss on her own but I also feel quite gleeful in other ways that I wont have to deal with any of the crap. but then that makes me feel guilty that I am so happy to revel in other peoples misery! jesus my head is fucked.
In other news, today I am making curry including tarka dahl from scratch.
Liam got back from frankfurt last night and although he accepts my mental problems are real all he seemed bothered about was pointing out that no matter what I had to work to bring in a wage to pay for us to live in this house. He's very direct no?